Best Dark Pick Up Lines, Dark Quotes or Captions for Instagram/Snapchat

Normal pickup lines are a thing of the past. It is now possible to say that they are overrated. These days it’s necessary to use some borderline dangerous pickup lines to get someone’s attention.

However, it cannot be denied that such dark pick-up lines are not for the faint-hearted. Avoid using it on lighthearted individuals. You should not use our dark humour pick up lines unless you’re willing to face one on your own.

It is possible, however, to see the best results you have ever seen if you are willing to take a risk. When you use a dark pickup line, you will not only attract someone’s attention but you will also be surprised at their response. Now let’s get right to the pickup lines and stop wasting time with this chatter.

Best Dark Pick Up Lines For Instagram/Snapchat

Best Dark Pick Up Lines
  • We all die someday. Wanna go out with me?
  • Tell me you are a banana because I find you peeling.
  • Smell this rag! I’m sure you can inhale the chloroform.
  • You have the most beautiful states I have ever seen. Can I be reincarnated as your child? I would like to suck on them till I am old and greying.
  • You look very familiar. Have I met you recently? It must be the clothes that are confusing me. I can’t identify you with them.
  • Can I borrow that shirt off you right now? I want to go pay the bartender but I don’t wanna go alone. 
  • I’ve been noticing you noticing me. If you wouldn’t mind, I would like to change the multiple noticing into notices of o****** for you!
  • How do I get the STUD? I only have STD and U are all I need!
  • Your outfit is so dazzling. Do you know how it can look better? Rumpled in a bunch on mysteries that haven’t been solved.
  • Wow! I could never have guessed you look way better in person than what I have been seeing through my telescope.
  • What genre of music do you like? Why not heavy metal? I can make you learn how to scream.
  • How are you not tired? You’ve been engaged in a naked marathon in my mind all day. 
  • I’m stalking you because you might as well be a cornfield
  • If I could choose a place around you to live, I will choose your socks. I want to be with you only every damn step of the journey. 

Funny Dark Pick Up Lines: Dark Humor pick up lines

  • I would like to have a clone of you to myself. Can you offer me your groin hair? I hear that works better.
  • Stop being melancholic. I know your crush is dead. I did it so that you can be with me. 
  • There must be something wrong with my eyesight. I need your help, I just can’t take them off you.
  • I will hate having to spike your drink. Simply agree with me now.
  • You can call me baby. All I want to be is inside you forever.
  • I love your T-shirt. Can I study it in Braille? And no, you don’t have to take it off. 
  • You want to call the cops. Go ahead, see who comes first.
  • Can I ask you to drop dead? I’m a necrophiliac and I might just think about it. 
  • You have such a banging body, the last time I had such a body to myself, I was stuffing it in my basement. 
  • I am trying to establish a p*** network. Will you do me the honour of being my first client?
  • How do you like your milk delivery? Across the front or back? I wouldn’t mind taking it through the back
  • I hate a ride but I would have to come between you and your dress. It is not needed at the moment

Read Also if You Like it

Morbid Pickup Lines: The Most Edgy pick up lines

  • Did you choke on a light bulb? Your chest is all flashy
  • I want to touch you but you have to promise not to call the cops. 
  • Come for a ride! I am a friend of your dad
  • I’m throwing you a house party. On my bed
  • I’m having trouble thinking straight. All the blood from my brain has been trained to give me a boner.
  • Do you know what I have got? A knife and a p****. One of them is going inside you tonight.
  • What’s the difference between a jet and a boner? I don’t have a jet
  • If you ever want to have the first kid, you will get in bed with me. 
  • I’m new to this area. Can you lead me on the way to your apartment?
  • I wish I could be your bathwater. So I can slither all-around your books and crevices.
  • How do I like my women? The way I like my coffee. Black and sealed in a bag that is airtight. Also, stored in the deep freezer.
  • Are you a light switch? I keep getting turned on every time you are around.
  • I can see our future. We are destined to be married. 
  • Hey, I have candy out in the back. It is in my van. Would you care for some?
  • Hi, I came to talk to you following the instructions of the voices in my head. 
  • Excuse me, I would like to help you exorcise a monster that grows next to you. All you have to do is suck my c***. 
  • Hey, I notice an abundance of meals down your crotch. Will you like me to eat you out?
  • You look pretty good. I must have had quite a lot to drink.

Our Personal Favorite Dark Pick up Lines

Preface it with, “Do you want to hear to darkest pickup line ever?”

  1. Damn girl, are you a schoolhouse? Because I’d shoot kids in you.
  2. Do you work on the subway? Because you’re giving me a foot long.
  3. Is your daddy a baker? Because you got some nice buns.
  4. Do you work at McDonald’s’? Because I’m loving it.
  5. Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only 10 I see
  6. Are you a shark? Cos I’ve got some swimmers for you to swallow

Before you Go.

Discover some master class pick up lines that will make you fall in love.


That’s all I’ve got for you. You can use any of these dark pickup lines on anyone who likes you. If you have any others, please let us know in the comments.

Let us warn you upfront: You are entirely responsible for how these lines are received by the recipients, so proceed with caution.

You can rest assured that they are amazing and fun. Please bookmark this page, as new ones are added regularly.

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